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Dreamless

My mouth is full of ashes. I’m choking on dust. I can’t breathe any more… You, there. Yes, you, God. Up in the sky, in my heart, whatever. I’m mad at You. You already knew that. I know that much. I’m...

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Unashamed: Part Deux

Compared to the time I wet my pants in second grade, it was nothing. (Yeah, we’ll talk about that another time. Maybe.) It was the first day of first grade, in my new parochial school, Saint John the...

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God-Sized Dreams: Wanting More

I’m afraid to dream. I am. This week’s assignment (being shared here) was: Link-up your blog post sharing: What do you really want more of in your life? Will you dare to say it out loud? Hint: it...

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Five Minute Friday: Worship

You’ll know it after it happens, but probably not during. It could happen anywhere. Dancing in a moonlit grove. Kneeling in a quiet cathedral. Chanting with some Tibetan Buddhists. Washing the dishes....

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Just pretending

I am a fake. I’m pretending to be normal, and if they find out, something bad will happen. ***** This is the current mental conversation: I can’t deal with this. Don’t say “can’t.” You can deal with...

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Shut up!

I’m not her any more. I’m not. I used to be her… the one who blogged about being in a tar pit; the one who wrote about how I was mad at God; the one who got angry at my messy, sad excuse for a life;...

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No words…

Because someone broke into my house and stole my laptop. With all my writing. And pictures. The DVD player is missing, too, but I don’t care about that. Because it’s not about the object. It’s about...

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Five Minute Friday: Free

I kneel down, right down in the grassy margin between the church’s foundation and the sidewalk, the sounds of a hundred people scratching their way along the asphalt street ten feet away fading from my...

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What Does It Mean to be a Queen?

If you were a queen, what kind of queen would you be? A “good” queen? A bad one? Can you even imagine it? Perhaps you’ve come to think of queens as people that only show up in fantasy novels like those...

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When You’re Overwhelmed

I wasn’t planning on things getting worse. But then they did. I have been steadily caregiving for my elderly parents. Along with a variety of the other ailments that come with aging, like heart...

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